A guide to crossing into Zambia at the Kazungula border crossing.
Rule #1: You are not a truck driver. Do not join the truck queue!
This beastly queue extends for kilometers. The ferry’s can only manage one truck at a time and preference is given to passenger vehicles. A truck driver can easily sit over a week in the queue waiting to cross. The locals have claimed ownership over the communal water tap and will sell you government water by the glass.
Rule #2: In the event of a sudden loss of buoyancy, swim down.
The Kazungula Ferries themselves are not SABS* approved and a couple have sunk in the past. Many of the locals are unable to swim making the death toll for a sinking vessel deplorably high. In the event of a catastrophe, swim down first and away from the non-swimmers who would drag you under.
Rule #3: Be bad at making friends.
You will be overwhelmed with scamsters trying to “assist” you with the border crossing process and drunkards offering to protect your car. In general, a healthy degree of disengagement from the individual you are dealing with is a good sign that you are in the right place, dealing with a legitimate border official.
Rule #4: Wear your fitbit (you’ll be doing some walking).
There are a total of four different vehicle related fees you need to pay at the border. Each of these payments are facilitated by a different person, sitting at the end of a different queue, in a different building / shipping container. A great example of government leading in job creation.
Rule #5: Cover your ass-ets.
It is compulsory to purchase third party insurance in Zambia. We insured at the border with General Alliance Insurance Limited. They have no contact number for claims. They don’t even have a pretend one. As futile an exercise as this may seem it is well worth doing. There is a permanent police roadbock 2km down the road from the border and they will fine you heavily if you do not have a piece of paper bearing the words “Third Party Insurance”.
Rule #6: Grab a Mielie.
There are local gogos** walking around selling boiled mielies for 5 kwacha a pop. They are delicious and make for a great snack food while you wait in the queues.
Rule #7: Keep the right change.
There are more money changers at the border than you can count and some with questionable ethics. If you want piece of mind find a place with a permanent shelter and the exchange rate written down on a board. You need a combination of USD and Zambian Kwacha for the border fees.
*SABS: The South African Bureau of Standards
**Gogo: The zulu word for granny.
Joburg to Scotland 